Driving Jokes

The National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had covertly funded a project with the auto makers for the past five years, whereby the auto makers were installing black boxes in four wheel drive pickup trucks, in an effort to determine, in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before the crash.

They were surprised to find in 48 of the 50 states, the last words of the drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, "OH SHIT!" Only the state of Montana was different, where over 89.3 percent of the final words were:

"Hold my beer and watch this."

There is a guy who's driving down the side of the road on the country side. And he has a problem everytime he see's a blac person he has to run him over.So he was driving and he saw a priest walkind down the side of the road.So the guy gave him a ride.He said "father,can you help me i have a problem" Father says " what is your problem".ZTHe guy said everytime i see a black person i run them over.The father said Sorry my son i cannot help you there.When all of a sudden,the guy said see there's one now."Did i get'em father" "No you doid not,but i got close enough to hit him with a gas can"

there was a speeding car. he stopped the car because a police man was following him. the police man asked if the the driver was drinking because he looked bad. the driver asked if he was eating dounuts because he looked a little chubby.